Step 6: CHECKING THE RESULTS
There are Six Steps of the "No-Lose Method". After going through the first five steps, Step 6: Checking The Results is important to make certain everyone's needs have been met and the solutions from Method III conflict resolution turns out to be the best.
It's not always the case that all solutions from Method III conflict resolution turn out that way. Sometimes you or the other will discover weaknesses in the solution that will require modification or rejection for a better solution.
It is important to seek out the other's feelings about the solutions as well as to keep in touch with your feelings about the conflict resolution results.
Both of you should have an understanding that decisions are always open for mutually acceptable revisions.
Sometimes those new to Method III will discover that they have overcommitted themselves--in their enthusiasm they agreed to do too much or the impossible. Be sure to keep the door open for revision if this happens.
Your best tools for effective No-Lose Conflict Resolution will always be:
- Active Listening
- Clear and Honest Sending of Your Needs with Non-Blameful I-Messages
- Trust and Respect for the Needs of the Other
- Openness to Changing Facts and Feelings
- An Unwillingness to Let Method III Fail
- Entering Method III Without Fixed Solutions
- Refusal to Revert to Method I or II*
*Excerpt from Dr. Thomas Gordon's F.E.T. Adult Resource Book